How to coach your team (without making them defensive)
When I give honest feedback, I don’t want people to argue with me. Here's a simple technique I use so my direct reports are more likely to listen with an open mind.
feedback
When Expressing Gratitude to Employees, Timing Matters
Extensive research has indicated the benefits of showing gratitude to those around you, including your colleagues or employees. However, a new study suggests that the timing of these expressions can make a big difference. Through two experiments and an analysis of a top…
How to give a senior leader feedback (without getting fired)
There’s a right and wrong way to proceed. Here’s how to increase the chances your leader listens and takes action--while reducing the chance they feel threatened.
How to Ask for the Feedback You Really Need
When we ask for feedback on our work, we often get poor-quality feedback that’s not useful or that makes us feel attacked or defensive. Part of the reason is in how we’re asking for feedback. Most requests are too generic, too open, and too late. The result is that you’re more…
When your coworker does great work, tell their manager
Stand Out by Giving Feedback the Right Way
Most managers suck at giving feedback — it’s too infrequent and not actionable enough.
How to Talk with Your Team About the Elephant in the Room
If your team feels “stuck,” the problem might involve issues that are difficult to discuss — conflict between two team members, for example, or an underperforming employee. To address these issues head-on, leaders must learn the art of framing a conversation so people can…
How to Be Resilient in the Face of Harsh Criticism
Most of us have been “feedsmacked” at some point in our life. In the midst of a meeting, an innocent walk down the hallway, or a performance review, someone delivers a verbal wallop that rocks us to our psychological footings. These situations are so tough to handle because we…
An Old Diagnosis: The Common Scold
The "common scold," recognized in England for centuries is still with us. Although such a person is not described in the psychiatric literature, I describe his/her principal elements here.
How Great Leaders Respond to Negative Criticism in the Digital Age
Corporate leadership today is more public than ever before thanks to digital communication and the web. The status quo has been upended by the ease with
Have the Courage to Be Direct
It’s time to get past the human tendency to avoid conflict-causing topics.
Book Review: Turn the Ship Around! How to Create Leadership at Every Level
I just had the pleasure of reading David Marquet's book, Turn the Ship Around!: A True Story of Turning Followers into Leaders*, and I have been encouraging everyone I see
How to Deliver Constructive Feedback in Difficult Situations
Thoughtful, empathetic language can make or break your business relationships
Identify Leaders By Giving People Assignments - Brad Feld
As the Boulder Startup Community evolved, I started to become inundated with people who wanted to get involved. Some of these were locals while others where people looking to move to Boulder, or who had recently moved here. Some where people known to me while others were new…
The Appeal to the Stone Fallacy: When People Are Dismissive During Discussions
Be a Minimally Invasive Manager
It’s not your job to carry the ball, but to run interference for those who do.
Anna Shipman
Strategic technology leader
Double Crux — A Strategy for Resolving Disagreement
(Cross posted to LessWrong)
The Key to Giving and Receiving Negative Feedback
It doesn’t have to be painful.
Beginner's Guide to Arguing Constructively
How to turn arguments from vicious battles into productive dialogues.
Why criticism lasts longer than praise
Most of us are subjected to insults, sarcastic comments or bad feedback in our everyday lives. But we weren't built to deal with torrents of criticism.
What’s Your Listening Style?
We may have learned that we need to let people speak without interrupting but taking turns talking does not truly denote listening. And unintentionally hijacking conversations to advise, inject humor, empathize, prioritize efficiency, or insert ourselves into the speaker’s…
What You’re Saying When You Give Someone the Silent Treatment - ostracism
Social ostracism has been a common punishment for millennia. But freezing someone out harms both the victim and the perpetrator.
Constructive criticism: how to give and receive feedback
Whether in our personal or professional lives, we are constantly giving and receiving feedback. Some of the feedback is subtle, often unconscious, and some of it is proactive. Being able to receive and to offer constructive feedback is an essential skill in building meaningful…
Giving Feedback to Someone Who Hasn’t Had It in Years
If you work with someone who’s gone too long without feedback and want to help them grow, you’ll need to take an empathetic approach to the conversation. Start by asking questions to clarify their motives. If a leader is constantly forcing their ideas on others, for example, you…
Our 6 Must Reads for Cutting Through Conflict and Tough Conversations
Big ideas, strong-willed characters, impossible deadlines and close quarters — if you wrote out a recipe for conflict, it might bear an uncanny resemblance to the high-stakes, pressure-cooker environment of a startup. We spoke with top engineers, seasoned managers and experts in…
How to Deliver Constructive Feedback in Difficult Situations
Thoughtful, empathetic language can make or break your business relationships
4-Part Nonviolent Communication (NVC) - PuddleDancer Press
Express and receive communication empathically using the four-part Nonviolent Communication process developed by Marshall B. Rosenberg, Ph.D.
Confidence Through Feedback, or Why Imposter Syndrome is the Wrong Metaphor
Imposter syndrome is often presented as a personal failing. A lack of confidence, our wrong-headed beliefs not matching the reality of how competent we are, or worst of a flaw of our gender. Just...
5 mistakes we all make with product feedback
It rarely makes sense to take product feedback from all users and it never makes sense to get it all at once. Five fixes feedback for your product.